When I (Almost) Quit Making Movies - The Query that Changed Everything #atozchallenge #IndieFilm
Once upon a time, an Australian filmmaker I met on MySpace (back when social networks were just starting to gain momentum) helped with the encoding of one of my short films and then asked me to tell him about the experiences making said movie. What followed was a letter that detailed various aspects of the project – from my scriptwriting process, through production and all the way to my very first acceptance notice from a film festival. If it weren’t for his inquiry, I may have never taken the time to sit back and reflect on the journey of trying to make something from little to nothing; all that went well, all that went wrong and nearly everything in between.
His one, simple query led to what became my production notes – a filmmaking diary of sorts – which is something that I would have otherwise never even considered writing at the time. I underestimated the importance of production notes. They can be therapeutic by helping filmmakers get an overview of what the timeline and progress (or halt) of their project looks like.
Writing to Quito made me realize that I made lots of poor decisions in trying to get a project off of the ground. The letter also caused me to notice when and where I gave up on doing what’s best for my project, me and my long-term professional goals; the moments where I pulled through and the rewarding results that came out of less-than-ideal circumstances. Although you might not understand if you’ve never made a movie, I’m almost certain that you can still relate to the feeling of wanting to give up on something that you once thought you wanted more than anything in the world.
When you’re making a movie, it's easy to get off-course, especially if you don't have a clear idea of what you're aiming for. In that case, it helps to have an end goal and not rely on making it up as you go along. It's also easy to not notice all of the areas where you should've done something different -- especially if you're rushing and everything becomes a blur in the mad dash to get a film in the can.
It wasn't until I wrote my letter to this Australian filmmaker who I met on MySpace, that I realized how many mistakes I made trying to salvage something that wasn't working on so many levels. I also realized that I was delusional about what I could accomplish with the things that were available to me.
Has anyone ever asked YOU a question that led to deep reflection on an experience that YOU otherwise wouldn’t have given a second thought about?
Reader Comments (5)
Yes! and I wish I could thank him or her but I don't remember who it was who really helped me out at a time when I was questioning the whole being a writer idea. The questions was, "Do you write because you feel like you should, or do you write because you can't NOT write?" I realized that even though I hadn't been putting the time needed into my blog, I was still writing. Journaling. Inventing characters and writing their descriptions. Carrying a notebook everywhere so that if I thought of something I wouldn't lose it between there and the nearest piece of paper. I was a WRITER, whether or not I was blogging. Once I separated being a blogger from being a writer, it all began to flow. I started just throwing posts up. I looked at my tagline, "Wanna be writer seeks place to vent, practice, and share" and realized that I'd lost the practice and share part. Venting? You can't stop me...you're welcome to try of course...
What had happened was that I'd gotten to know some really, really good writers. I'd been asked to join a private blog for group critique. I was honored and terrified, and immediately started comparing myself to them. All were published. All had huge followings at their (each had several) blogs, all were already friends, and then there was me, a little minnow in the ocean. I felt inadequate.
Then I realized, "Hey, I've been invited! They want ME." The words started flowing again, I resurrected Life is Good (it had never gone anywhere, just lost all but a few faithful readers due to the lack of posts...) I then found Alex and did the 2011 A-Z and now there's no looking back.
I think our two examples show how important it is to have a peer support group, and buddies who will ask you the hard questions and make you really think about what you are doing.
Great, THOUGHT PROVOKING (haha) post, Nicole.
Tina @ Life is Good
A to Z Team @ Blogging From A to Z April Challenge 2014
I think this happens a lot. That's why it's so important to connect with others and exchange ideas. Love synergy.
Neverlove, my first YA publication, probably wouldn't have become a novel if another blogger hadn't queried me about the story. And I probably would have given up on writing if I hadn't had another blogger bud query me about WHY I write. Once I re-established my base, I was back on writing track and haven't looked back since.
I can see that. Making a film sounds so involved and technical I can see getting lost in the details and losing the big picture.
Your words "I’m almost certain that you can still relate to the feeling of wanting to give up on something that you once thought you wanted more than anything in the world." really hit home for me. I've been feeling this way for at least two months (this time), and felt lucky that April came when it did to keep me writing, even if it isn't on my current wip. Thank so much for sharing...