Entertaining the Idea of Giving it Everything You’ve Got #atozchallenge #indiefilm

I read a book or article somewhere that said no one who is on the fence about filmmaking ever makes it. That begs the question – how much do we have to want this for us to stand a chance at reaching some pinnacle of success, whatever that looks like for each and every filmmaker?

It's almost like there are two ends of the spectrum -- the filmmakers who just dabble in it because they want to have fun and they think making movies provides their desired level of enjoyment, and the filmmakers who take this field seriously; sometimes maybe to the point that it stops being fun anymore as they become so focused on it eventually paying off in the end via studio deals or awards or whatever. The former was me then. The latter is me now. I guess the trick, or rather, the sweet spot is to find that middle ground where you have a balance of the two; the ability to recognize and enjoy the fun part while also keeping the serious aspects in mind.

Still, does film have to consume me in order for me to win? If so, why does it come at such a heavy price tag in terms of me having to put my all into it? Maybe this is required of any endeavor that you embark on. It's all or nothing and you must give it everything that you've got just to stand a chance at making a wave amidst all the noise. You can't be half-pregnant or a halfway gangster.

So I have to give each project that I work on everything I've got. That way, as least I can be satisfied if I choose to continue in film or move on to another area of interest. Giving it my all allows me to take a chance on myself and not have any regrets. The alternative doesn't do me or anyone else any good.

Have you read yesterday's post about Daring to Ditch Disadvantages Like Robert DeNiro yet?

What Ben Affleck Can Teach Us about Bravery #atozchallenge #RatedR #IndieFilm

"I'm grateful for everything you've done for me. You're like my brother...but I'm leaving. Are you gonna shoot me? Go ahead...but you'll have to shoot me in the back."

 – Ben Affleck as Doug MacRay in the Crime Drama “THE TOWN” 

A "Four Eyed Monsters" Scene Directed by Susan Buice and Arin CrumleyYou have to be willing to stand up for what you want. It's about making decisions for yourself that might be unpopular or unwelcome by the masses.

It's about hearing people or traditions or even your own self-doubt try to hold you back or forbid you from doing something different; entertaining new possibilities, and still pushing forward in a way that says "Screw you! I'm doing it anyway!" -- even if it means losing the relationships or status that you had with friends, family or the extended community, up until this point.

Bravery is the moment when you take huge risks to forego what's comfortable and familiar, in favor of the possibility to be in a situation that best meets your interests or needs. It surfaces when you stop questioning your own motives. It reveals itself the moment you quit making choices that you are less than enthusiastic about, only to please other people. Being an independent filmmaker requires a certain level of bravery at many stages of the process.

That scene in “The Town” where Ben Afflecks character basically tells his best friend to go fuck himself, is what I think it means to be brave. Three independent filmmakers, however, also come to mind when I think about what bravery looks like.

• Collaborators Susan Buice and Arin Crumley’s Do-It-Yourself approach to finding (and growing) an audience of more than a half million people is unlike anything that has been done before they made the comedy drama “Four Eyed Monsters.” 

They captured their filmmaking journey as well as a budding romantic relationship, and shared it in a series of video podcasts on their YouTube channel.

Buice and Crumley were brave to make their experiences public on another level, chronicling the pitfalls and successes that they each faced as artists, lovers and friends who mixed business with pleasure; all for the world to see – through massive credit card debt, depression, insecurities about STDs and all, despite the risk of being scrutinized by people in their own social circles, co-workers, roommates, YouTube viewers and film industry critics.

They were also brave to pursue non-traditional means of getting people to pay attention to their work, which included convincing fans to “request” their film in local theaters, which helped them organize a release correlating with the demand in cities across the country.

• Bravery explains how Steve Balderson can call people, companies and organizations on their bullshit while also questioning the conventional practices that we irrationally follow when it comes to the movie business. 

Balderson doesn't limit himself in any way and is not afraid to stay true to his vision. He stands tall even when people are walking out of the theater where his movie is playing, or throwing objects at the screen in anger during the film festival run for his comedy drama “Watch Out.” He has worked with some of the most unforgettable talent that a filmmaker could have the pleasure to direct, including the late actress Karen Black.

In filmmaking, as in other professions (and various areas of life, for that matter), there will be people like Ben Affleck’s (fictional) best friend, who will want to keep you from steering your life in the direction you want it to go in -- and in the way you so desire to do so. Appeasing those kinds of people doesn’t do anyone any good. I know I don’t have time for that kind of nonsense and I’m guessing that neither do you, so we’re both in the same boat. So whaddya say we tell them to go fuck themselves! Stand tall like Steve Balderson. Get creative with your pursuits like Arin Crumley and Susan Buice. Be brave.

What does Bravery look like to YOU?

If you haven’t already, read yesterday’s post: Awards are Worthless – The Anxiety of Seeking Approval as an Artist, the first installment in my series about Why We Make Movies.

Awards Are Worthless - The Anxiety of Seeking Approval as an Artist #atozchallenge #indiefilm

Actress KaDee Strickland and Director Akil DuPont at the Student Emmy Awards.Few people can deny how good it feels to receive an award or two, in many cases, no matter what it is for; Honor Roll, Student of the Week, Employee of the Month, MVP of the NBA, Magna Cum Laude, Pulitzer and Nobel prizes, you name it -- we salivate over and work our butts off to gain honors. This yearning was not lost on me when I started to pursue a career in film.

I wanted awards -- particularly an Oscar for Best Director or a Palme d’Or at Cannes, and I wanted them badly. Boy was I kidding myself by placing too much value on items that rarely offer more than décor and bragging rights.

I wonder -- aside from helping you build a pedigree, what are awards really worth, and what does it take to earn these coveted honors? As artists we must aim to make movies that are great. To win awards, however, these films have to not only be better than great but also considered worthy of recognition by a select group of people with varied levels of experience, talent and/or accolades in their own right. I invited a few select award-winning filmmakers to shed some light on the matter. Here, they make it clear how important awards are in terms of being a driving force behind what they do and the influence, if any, it has on their careers.

"To be honest, I just don't see the point of awards in the arts," says Amir Motlagh, director of “35 YEAR-OLD MAN,” “WHALE” and “KHOOBI,” who adds "I just can't find a justification for them -- But, I'm sure they feel good for the family. Oh, you get a few phone calls and I'm sure grabbing an Oscar would be a little different. Let's be honest here, who wouldn't want an Oscar for pragmatic reasons alone?" 

"PIG" Movie Producer Mark Stolaroff accepts an award for Best Sci-Fi Feature from program director Michael Stackpole at the Phoenix Film Festival. '“PIG” won 10 awards and "THE HOUSE THAT JACK BUILT" has already won two awards; for certain kinds of films -- especially these two films, they (awards) are kinda crucial in a way but at the same time, they don’t do everything for you, says Best Sci-Fi Feature winner Mark Stolaroff, producer of “PIG,” “THE HOUSE THAT JACK BUILT” and “MANIC.”' 

Stolaroff continues "They’re crucial in that both of these films are in a position where they really need an award because neither of them got into Sundance, which is the gold standard for films, and a lot of films don’t get into Sundance - like “SHORT TERM 12,” which is a terrific film that won Gotham awards and other accolades but didn’t get into Sundance.

When you don’t get into Sundance, SXSW, Toronto, Cannes and related festivals, you have to prove something to the kind of crowds that go to festivals. So, you have to get into a lot other festivals to show your merit and then you have to win awards to measure up – otherwise, you don’t really have an art film. You may have a good film, but it’s not an art film. Particularly with "Pig," it’s a really unusual situation; the movie fits between an art film and a genre film, although we never thought of it as a genre film when we were making it. If you have an art film, then winning an award can make a difference with your audience. If you have a genre film like a horror film or a Sci-Fi film, an award doesn’t necessarily matter."

Student Emmy winner Akil Dupont, director of "UNDERGROUND" and "SILHOUETTES" says "I’ve won 25 awards as a filmmaker so far; they come with some things – some tangible things! The majority of them – probably more than half – did not come with anything, and some didn’t actually give me a physical award. It ranges from nothing beyond an “attaboy” and acknowledgement on a website to money and mentorship.

Director Akil DuPont on the set of his fairy-tale romance drama "SILHOUETTES."Inside the industry, my theory is that people are not as concerned with awards as they are with other things because film is still a business.

The monetization of your product is what they’re most concerned with – how can it still turn over to make money, because you still have to make money with these films.

Some people think that awards are sorta the gateway into the industry; and in some sense they may be but in another sense, people in the industry still want to see what you can do moneywise.

What filmmaker doesn’t want the Academy Award?!! We all want one – an Academy Award, a Golden Globe, an Emmy, a Tony, a Grammy. I was hoping that "UNDERGROUND" would be nominated for a Short Film Oscar. Right now, I think this movie has the DNA for the stage, so I’m looking to see what we can get, as far as going to Broadway is concerned."

Ari Gold, director of "ADVENTURES OF POWER," "HELICOPTER" and "CULTURE" says "The student Oscar has been helpful in the sense that when I’m soliciting investment or collaborators, it makes people take me a little bit more seriously than they might otherwise. That doesn’t necessarily mean direct employment but it means that my calls or emails are slightly more likely to be answered. Interestingly, I got a bunch of Audience Awards for my feature film ("ADVENTURES OF POWER") and those have had no impact whatsoever, which is a sorta interesting contrast, but that’s the reality.

Director Ari Gold awarded for his contributions to independent film.You can daydream about getting awards but I think I’m smart enough to know that’s not the point. For me, I like to connect with an audience and know people are responding to my work, so that always is the most powerful kind of motivator. Does that mean that if I make something that reaches a huge audience that I’ll be exponentially happier? No, of course not. Although it seems like it would be nice, I’m aware that it’s a fallacy; the more successful people get, the more successful they think they need to get.

So, I want my work to be satisfying to me and satisfying to people who watch it – that’s the biggest award."

My Own Thoughts on Awards

Our culture views awards as a stamp of approval for being the best, under the expectation that a movie and its maker have been vetted against other projects of equal or higher merit. So who is to say that you and/or your work are not one of the best -- all based on whether you’ve been honored for your contributions to a particular industry or for a certain creation? Martin Scorsese, one of the greatest directors in the history of American cinema, has claimed many accolades including an American Film Institute (AFI) Lifetime Achievement Award, yet, got snubbed by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences (aka the folks in charge of the Oscars) on many occasions.

The man who helmed “Goodfellas,” “Taxi Driver,” “The Departed” and “Hugo” is no less talented, enthusiastic about his work or successful just because he lacks those golden statues. In a career that spans over 30 years, Scorsese has received 8 Academy Award nominations for Best Director and one win, to date. If it’s tough for a legendary director such as Martin Scorsese to win an Oscar, I must come to terms with how little weight awards really hold, where matters of career satisfaction and success are concerned.

Film Still | Amir MotlaghSo the way I see it, going after nothing more than shiny statues, medals or plaques after all is said and done would be selling myself short; it does not justify the amount of blood, sweat, tears, time, money and resources that are put into each independent film and the disappointments, rejections, failures and learning experiences that come out of a project.

Make no mistake about it – I do still like awards and would appreciate those that come my way. I am just working on readjusting my priorities because accolades are just not enough to keep me on this filmmaking train. I don’t want to make movies merely for a chance at winning awards, given that there is no guarantee I’ll be in the running for one and they usually don’t come with anything other than a title and something pretty to look at.

I figure, the best way to benefit from awards is by using them as leverage, since a lot of them don’t automatically come with deals and offers for the next gig.

Stay tuned for more reflections and observations on the journey of independent filmmaking!

In the meantime...

• Motlagh's short films such as "Khoobi" can be watched online
• Gold's comedy "Adventures of Power" is available on YouTube
• Stolaroff's mystery/Sci-Fi "PIG" movie is viewable on DVD and through iTunes
• DuPont's full historical musical "Underground" film is online to watch

Does winning an award have any bearing on whether YOU’VE done good work?

Can YOU be considered among the best in your field, without being the recipient of awards?

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*Photos courtesy of DuPont Productions, The Pig Picture and Ari Gold Films.