Why Make Movies? An A-to-Z Challenge Theme Reveal

Chris Chambers in Steve Balderson's action crime comedy "Culture Shock."When was the last time you stayed at a job, in a relationship or pursuit of a goal that cost you more than what you earned from doing it?

How many times have you said to yourself “maybe tomorrow things will improve” only to wonder what happened along the way? No one in their right mind would continue in an undesirable situation or on an unforgiving path, yet, I find myself wondering what I’m doing making movies.

Let it be clear that when I say movies and/or film, I’m referring to independent films. This is not to discount or deny the many difficulties that take place on studio-backed movies in Hollywood. Martin Sheen collapsed from a heart attack during the production of Francis Ford Coppola’s “Apocalypse Now” -- in a tumultuous turn of events that also included Coppola suffering an epileptic seizure; the untimely deaths of Paul Walker and Philip Seymour Hoffman have the forces in tinsel town scrambling to salvage the next installments in the “Fast and Furious” and “Hunger Games” franchises. If it’s hard for the big-wigs, then it’s ten times more difficult for those of us who are trying to make our own way outside of the “system.”

Independent films take so long, require a seemingly never-ending stream of sacrifices and we (filmmakers) have to overcome obstacle after obstacle without ever knowing if we’ll achieve our goals. Maggie Hadleigh-West and her camera crew were robbed at gunpoint during their first day of production on a documentary. Audiences in Washington D.C. got up out of their seats, yelled expletives, threw things at the screen and then walked out of the theater during a showing of Steve Balderson's comedy drama “Watch Out.” I haven’t begun to even scratch the surface in terms of creating a body of work where motion pictures are concerned. Based on the difficulties that I’ve had to deal with so far, however, I’m wondering – what’s it all really worth?

Joseph Gordon-Levitt on the set of his directorial debut 'Don Jon.'I often find myself questioning whether or not I want to do this again. So, during April, I will be sharing my observations on the 26 (or less) reasons why writers, directors and/or producers make movies. In these posts, I also aim to include the perspectives of fine, visual and performance artists at various stages in their careers. It is by exploring such observations on filmmaking from A-Z that I hope you will walk away with at least one -- if not two things:

• Knowledge of a new or little known movie, album, book or related work that you want to check out

• Inspiration to apply aspects of the subject matter to an area of your own life and/or goals

For me, I’m just trying to figure out how to justify or make sense of the ongoing stumbling blocks, rejections, isolation and closed doors that I face at every step of the way in my projects. Maybe it’s the universe telling me that I need to do something else. Maybe it’s a challenge that is meant to aid in my growth and prepare me for the next steps. Maybe I’m just looking at it all wrong or neglecting things that I should be paying more attention to. Maybe I have different goals than when I started pursuing film.

Or maybe, just maybe I don’t know what I want. No matter the case, I do know one thing – the need to figure out a justification for this masochistic path called moviemaking is urgent like a motherfucker.

When (and even before) a film is in the can, it seems like nobody even cares. Filmmakers have to constantly be on-the-go, trying like hell to convince people to watch our work, while all along hoping that they end up liking it or some aspect therein. It reminds me of the Linkin Park song – “I tried so hard and got so far but in the end, it doesn’t even matter.”

We bust our butts to make these movies and then in the end, it doesn’t matter because it seems like no one wants to be bothered watching them or buying them or renting them.

If people don’t want to be bothered checking out independent films, and crews are reluctant to work on them, and actors don’t want to help make these projects be all they can be, and media/industry/communities won't cover our work and theaters/TV channels aren't interested in paying these projects any mind, then why should we even bother making them? This is the question that leads to the central focus of my 2014 Blogging from A-to-Z Challenge theme. So find yourself a good seat, grab some popcorn and enjoy the show!

Also, you might want to keep the kids away because the upcoming posts are approved for audiences age 17 or older. There will not be blood but there will likely be strong language. Reader discretion is advised. I approved this message. 

Photos ('Culture Shock' and 'Don Jon,' respectively) courtesy of Anthony Pedone and Daniel McFadden ©2013 Relativity Media, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

Why Doing the ‘Blog Everyday in May Challenge’ is Like Watching Adult Movies

As the Blog Everyday in May Challenge comes to a close, I won’t miss it one bit. Hosted by a photographer named Jenni at Story of My Life, the blogathon invited bloggers – many of them women – to get back into the joy of writing by posting something daily this month.

There were even 31 “prompts” to help curb any writer’s block or blogging anxiety that might result from the pressure of coming up with new ideas each day. I liked the premise and the goal seemed promising, so I joined in but with each day that passed, it felt like the type of isolated experience that one would get when watching an adult movie a.k.a. porn.

People consume movies at the R rating, and below, much differently than they would movies rated NC-17 and above to XXX – understandably so in certain circumstances. It’s a kind of dirty little secret that you wouldn’t be caught dead discussing with your co-workers or the cashier at the gas station. We’re quicker to shout out and celebrate our plans for watching the latest Hollywood and Indie flicks that hit theaters nationwide.

We’ll buy $22 tickets to see “Iron Man 3” in 3D; we’ll stand in line for hours to get advance tickets to “Star Trek Into Darkness,” discuss the impact that “42” has on modern day culture, with our friends over Sunday brunch; we’ll even tweet about our plans to see “The Hangover III” and post Instagram photos celebrating our kids’ enthusiasm for all the “Epic” swag they want at the mall. These same behaviors are seldom, if ever, extended to pornographic movies.

A lot of men and women won’t even go to adult theaters to watch porn. Instead, they obtain adult movies via mail-order, online streaming, a street DVD bootlegger, hotel rooms or whatever friend provides access to borrow from their “goodie” stash.

No one, presumably in their right mind (according to society’s standards), would openly pop in a porno at any family cookout, graduation party or evening dinner with significant others, just for entertainment purposes. As a result, many people watch (and enjoy) their adult movies alone, when no one else is around or less likely to catch them “in the act.” They admire the stars, follow the action scene by scene, make loud outbursts, and eat their popcorn or whatever tickles their fancy -- by themselves.

The general movie-going experience of viewing something exciting for the first time, surrounded by friends and strangers alike, is reduced to solo viewing sessions that are filled with angst and solitude. If you can imagine how isolating watching porn can be, you will have come to understand my experience as a participant in the Blog Everyday in May Challenge. The only difference is that I treated this blogathon like one would approach his or her night out on the town during opening weekend for “The Great Gatsby” – from obtaining tickets to merging with the crowd of excitement when the opening credits roll.

I announced my plans to join in on the (intended) fun of daily blogging in May, complete with the posting of this blogathon’s official badge. I visited the blogs of other participants and commented on their responses to Jenni’s prompts. I also added my posts to the Linky lists and made attempts to keep up after falling behind on some of the days. That was until I looked around and realized that nobody was “watching this movie” with me. I was sitting in a theater (blog) full of hundreds of seats but my fellow Blog Everyday in May Challenge participants (moviegoers) were not there with me. Do you know how boring it would be to watch “The Great Gatsby” at a multiplex theater, by yourself?

At best, you would probably doze off and miss a few parts of the flick. At worst, you would likely start texting your friends or get up and leave to go do something else that, at the moment, appears to be much more enjoyable. This sorta describes what happened in my failed quest to blog everyday in May with the rest of Jenni’s pack of ladies (and gents).

Over the last few years, I’ve done enough blogathons to get a good idea of how the lay of the land is shaping up with regards to level of participation among the signups.

The first week, if not first few days, of any blogathon usually indicates the height of what it has to offer participants throughout the entire run of the challenge. Based on the lack of interaction with participants, I sometimes either forgot that the challenge was still happening or lacked interest in mustering up enough energy to be active in an event that left me virtually empty handed in terms of engagement.

Even movies that bombed at the box office still had more action that I did this month, as it relates to the challenge. Although I was entertained and even inspired by the strength of participants whom I was already familiar with when the challenge began (such as Paula's Place), I did not enjoy the overall show. Here is the kicker tho -- I don’t even care about the fact that I didn’t finish this challenge. I was trying it on for size, like a pair of jeans or shoes that one would hope to to rock really well!

So, I am not disappointed in falling short of completing it at all; in some ways, I view the experience as a slight interference with my Post A-to-Z Road Trip as in, I could’ve been doing something better with my time. That is why the Blogging from A-to-Z Challenge and blogathons like it (Darren Rowse’s 31 Days to Build a Better Blog and maybe, The Lamb Devours the Oscars, even) are dominating the online space where active engagement among participants of these monthly challenges is concerned.

My aim is not to put other blogathons up on some pedestal nor sound like a spoiled A-to-Z Challenge brat. I’m just calling it like I’ve experienced it among all of the ones that I’ve been involved in. That said, the Blog Everyday in May Challenge showcased similar characteristics of blogathons that were a waste of time for me, from a general standpoint. After doing a handful of online events including NaBloPoMo (multiple times), Wordcount Blogathon and now the Blog Everyday in May Challenge, to no avail, I’ve decided that these particular activities are not for me. The “community” aspect that they boast upon is pretty much nonexistent, in my experience.

Know that this post is not meant to deter anyone reading this from joining any of the blogathons mentioned here – including the Blog Everyday in May Challenge. Of the several hundred participants who joined in on this May challenge each day, I’ve yet to see any visitors (I checked my analytics before writing this post) or commenters that have come here from the Linky list or my own comments on participating blogs – save for Wayne at Wayne's Wonderous Website.

The Pros in a Nutshell - It did introduced me to two blogs that I will return to and continue to read, including Erika’s life adventures that stretch from here to overseas and back again at Chimerikal (she rocks, by the way! If you haven't read her blog, I recommend paying it a visit).

The Cons in a Nutshell - This challenge left much to be desired in terms of meeting new people, growing your readership and getting back into the groove of making writing a fun activity again instead of a chore. I’m not motivated to continue to write for a group of people who won’t even stop by to say hello. I’m also not interested in participating in any group activity that appears to benefit only those who are either first in line on the Linky or have already built a relationship with other participants – including the host, prior to the start of the challenge.

Since I’m from the “blogathons are what you make it” school of thought, it would be silly of me to avoid recommending the Blog Everyday in May Challenge to other people who might be interested in joining as a participant in the future. Did it work for me? No. Would I do it again? Probably not.

Like any event or activity, however, I still think that those who are interested in this challenge or any similar blogathons (NaBloPoMo, etc.) would be best served trying these events out for themselves to determine if it’s a good fit. Your experiences could be different, even better, than mine. In fact, I hope they are – because my guess is that you’d rather be in a packed theater cheering on Captain Kirk’s crew than in a hotel room browsing through the Playboy TV’s ON Demand catalog!

What is YOUR most favorite blogathon that YOU participated in, to date?

Do YOU prefer watching movies alone or in the company of someone else?

Courage Under Fire - My 2013 A to Z Challenge Reflections #atozchallenge

"I believe that if, at the end of it all, according to our abilities, we have done something to make others a little happier, and something to make ourselves a little happier, that is about the best we can do. To make others less happy is a crime. To make ourselves unhappy is where all crime starts. We must try to contribute joy to the world. That is true no matter what our problems, our health, our circumstances. We must try. I didn't always know this, and am happy I lived long enough to find it out." - Roger Ebert

Life is a constant battle where we go to war with strangers, enemies, family, friends, co-workers and (what seems to be the most damaging) – with ourselves. The 2013 Blogging from A to Z Challenge was my opportunity to try and find some answers to the question “What makes life worth living?” by presenting some outlooks on the options that we have with the 24 hours in our day.

Here are some of my experiences that made those 26 days in April exciting, trying and worth every single minute.

The Plan of Attack

A lack of internet access caused me to have to manage my daily schedule wisely while also being as resourceful as possible to carry out the necessary A to Z duties – commenting, posting and visiting. This was my first year as a Co-Host, which added additional tasks such as policing sign-ups, carrying out Twitter shifts and addressing questions or concerns at the A to Z Blog. Add to that the fact that I didn’t have a theme until like three days before the challenge started and you have a recipe for the chaos that involves posting everyday – sometimes on a whim – with only an idea but no outline.

So, I developed a system of what I call “A to Z Hacks,” which included scheduling two posts at a time within the limited timeframe that local libraries gave me to use their computers – which was sometimes two hours and often as little as 90 minutes, depending on the day. When all other ideas failed or I couldn’t figure out what to write for meaty posts, I took advantage of the Wordless Wednesdays meme as well as List-style posts just to get something up quickly without any hassle. I also used the Sundays that we had off as my “catch-up” day during weeks when I was behind by a letter (or two).

Since this was the first year I fell behind while doing the challenge, I posted announcements on my most recent posts, giving visitors either a heads-up (if I was sick or knew that I would be away from the computer) or an update on when they can expect to see latest letters up on this blog. Doing all of these things saved me a lot of time, worry and frustration.

The Battles

I went to places like Starbucks and Qdoba when the library wasn’t a viable option; The WiFi at these places was shoddy – sometimes going down suddenly or becoming very slow.

There were occasions when the connection would timeout while I was in the middle of typing up posts or finding photos; there were days when the computer browser would just not move while I tried to format and publish a new post for the challenge. On another occasion, I had so much to do between visiting blogs, responding to comments, corresponding with the other Co-Hosts about administrative matters and updating my blog that I had to prioritize the tasks that were going to get done immediately and the ones that were going to be put off for the next day, because a Starbucks employee told me they were closing in 10 minutes.

Some blogs that I visited – particularly the ones on the Blogger platform -- had Google+ setup for their comments; it was impossible for me to leave comments on those blog posts because I don’t have a Google+ profile. Since I usually didn’t find this out until after reading the posts and then scrolling to the bottom of them to write a comment, the experience left me feeling like I wasted my time on some (I say some because I enjoy reading a portion of them and would have likely visited a few of these blogs anyway, regardless of their commenting system) of the blogs that were new to me. I did, however, manage to find a way around this and other commenting problems (disabled comments, etc.) – sorta.

If the bloggers were on Twitter, I’d just send them a tweet with one quick comment, just so they would know that I am reading their posts.

The Medals of Honor

Surprisingly, I received some subscribers through a service called Bloglovin’ – which was I found to be interesting given that I didn’t use the service. So because of these subscribers, I signed up for Bloglovin’ just in case it made it easier for other A to Z participants to follow my blog that way.

I also won two blog awards – Holly at It’s all a Matter of Perspective gave me the Liebster Award because she likes the theme that I chose for this year. Although the award was given to me in March, she found my blog because of the A to Z Challenge, so it warrants a mention in this reflections post.

On April 10^th, Jean Yates gave me the Very Inspiring Blogger Award because she learns so much from the honest observations that I derive out of movies featured here on this blog; As if I didn’t already feel like the pressure is on…now, I have try to live up to that. Yikes! Much like last year, the comments I received came in heavy loads at the start of the challenge and then shrunk mid-way through April until they all but vanished towards the last few letters. Still, I have no complaints because many of the comments that were made on my posts were some of the most heartfelt responses that one could read in on a blog.

Kristen Dyrr at Random Musings from the KristenHead someone who I am especially delighted to have read my posts because she showed me the best comment love. I was also glad that several other bloggers became regulars among the discussions presented here, including Bev, Sam, Matthew MacNish, C. Lee McKenzie, Suzy Turner, nutschell, Alison, Heather, Nina D’Arcangela, Dee, Bob Sanchez and Jeremy (Hawkins).

Angela Brown at Pursuit of Publishness, who participated in the 2012 challenge and is currently working on her latest YA masterpiece, stopped by many times to share insight on life and all its layers while Maurice Mitchell at The Geek Twins brought his Sci-Fi twist to the challenge this year – I am so happy that he jumped on our alphabet blogging train because of his great sense of community; I noticed his comments on many blogs while doing my rounds of visiting during the challenge.

The Minion Soldiers

My Mighty Madlab Minions were in full swing leading up to and during the A to Z Challenge. They kept this machine well-oiled and running on time – their efforts were a tremendous help this year, given my technical setbacks in April. M.J. Joachim not only managed multiple blogs during the challenge but was also very instrumental in keeping on top of the back-end administrative stuff throughout April. She completed all of the tasks that I assigned to her while also putting in extra help during times when I didn’t have any open assignments, and was always available, prompt and thorough in helping me make sure that the challenge ran as smooth as we could get it this year.

If M.J. is a part of any future minion team, I would make her a Minion Crew Chief, to be sorta like an executive assistant who oversees the tasks for all minions. She also visited my blog often and made it a point to leave comments on additional participant blogs that were in our assigned sections. She rocks! Sheila Scribbles is someone who I’d nickname “Social Sheila” because she was very active on Twitter – utilizing the #atozchallenge hashtag and even adopted use of the #madlabminions hashtag early on when I released it.

Sheila also had the brevity thing down to a science, as she shared her favorite things from A to Z in short blog posts that were easy to read in a flash.

Tami Von Zalez kept me up to speed when dealing with changes to the list and was also very prompt in sending reports about things that needed to be addressed and/or reviewed for further action. Sydney Aaliyah held her own while showing people around Dallas, Texas – complete with places to visit and fun facts about that city. It’s been a treat to have her on my team because she inspired me to get more organized in the handling of all the back-end A to Z administrative stuff.

The De-Briefing

Yes, I lost some battles during the A to Z Challenge – but I still managed to win the war. All that’s left is my hope of having brought some joy to those who read my posts during the challenge.

Throughout April, I learned a lot about other people's lives -- some who have been through divorce, custody battles, self-doubt and suicidal moments as well as individuals who are proud of their accomplishments, giving toward others, and sharing their dreams and goals.

So if this blog post has delivered even an inch of happiness, inspiration or a brief smile, then I believe I’ve done the best I could do during my time as a Co-Host and participant in the 2013 A to Z Challenge.

I would like to send a special shout out to Paula at Paula’s Place for staying course with the challenge all the way to the end. It is because of her that I'm toying around with the Blog Everyday in May Challenge – one that goes straight through with zero days off! As if my life isn’t already hectic; I guess I’m burning for more mountains to climb until I collapse, maybe?! The challenge was tough – I’m not going to lie about it but I still enjoyed the experience and would do it all over again in a New York minute if given the chance.

My Co-Hosts are the kind of leaders that I am proud to stand next to on this journey because they faced much adversity for days or weeks on end and still came out strong.

When Google tried to take Stephen Tremp down, he took to twitter and kept on going, doing what he could to make sure that participants knew where to find his A to Z musings. Technical challenges, health scares, traveling woes, parenting duties, 9-to-5s and related curveballs didn’t stop Arlee Bird, Konstanz, Tina Downey, Shannon, Damyanti, Livia Peterson, Alex J. Cavanaugh, DL Hammons, L. Diane Wolfe or any Co-Host heading up this challenge. They are a group of tenaciously efficient individuals filled with encouragement and understanding.

Would do another A to Z in the future? Yes.

In fact, I'm Co-Hosting the Post A-to-Z Road Trip with Shannon and Tina. We're inviting people to join us in visiting all of the participating blogs between now (signups are open today!) and the next April Challenge.

Over, and out!