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How to Have a Heart – The Gavin vs. Doyle Complex
Thursday, April 9, 2015 at 8:00AM “We all have the potential to be an angel or a devil. Most of us are in between.” - Tania Yardley
A legendary singer named Michael Jackson once said “we are the world.” So, if our society is ever going to grow for the better, it starts with us not fixating on our agendas in ways that come at the expense of everyone else’s ability to fulfill their purpose.
All around the world, it seems like people are only concerned with getting theirs, which leads to more conflict as we all try to navigate life from the confines of our own little bubbles, without concern for the next person. A lawyer named Gavin found this out the hard way after his car collided with that of an insurance broker by the name of Doyle, in the dramatic thriller Changing Lanes starring Ben Affleck and Samuel L. Jackson. The rushed and inconsiderate handling of this minor automobile accident leads to Gavin’s loss of a legal document with millions of dollars at stake, and costs Doyle the custody of his children – all within a mere 20 minutes.
Of course, there were other factors that may have contributed to Doyle’s court hearing not going in his favor but Gavin’s failure to acknowledge the presence and importance of other drivers on the road in the first place, makes this lawyer an accomplice to the chain of events that occurred on what seems like the worse days ever for both men. Unfortunately, their bad luck kept on coming because each man is only worried about himself and his own plight; how to get over on the other one and how to make their adversary pay because they blame each other for their problems. Do you want to know when things start looking up for both of them? It’s when both of these guys decided to have a heart.
So what does a movie about reckless driving, and road rage, have to do with the rest of us?! A whole hell of a lot, given that we not only perceive strangers (and even those we know) to be hurdles that we must jump over to get on with our tasks, we treat them as such; as if they’re committing some type of crime by going at a pace that differs from ours and/or in a manner that does not meet our satisfaction.
Realize that you share this world with billions of other people who each have their own struggles, responsibilities and concerns. The next person has things to do, just like you. Someone else has strong viewpoints and belief systems, just like you. Another individual is seeking a way to get his or her needs met, just like you. We all have a sense of urgency for whatever it is we’re going after. The intensity may vary but the feeling is the same.
Can YOU describe a situation or matter you wish more people would approach with more compassion?
Reader Comments (9)
That's easy! Political discussions. I think if we stop calling those with differing beliefs "evil" or "hating their country" or whatever, we'd find in general that we have more in common than we realize. Yes, there are always a few people unwilling to be compassionate or compromise, but most of us just want a better world.
mean people suck. just be more nice and everything will be better. after all, we ARE the world. We have a responsibility to be nice. thats why the word human is in the middle of humane.
People should be good to each other. Turn the other cheek. Say pleas, thank you, and excuse me.
I think every single day people need to have more heart. Specifically when we are talking to someone about their job or livelihood. We don't know what they are going through, we don't know how much sweat and tears it took them to get to that place. But to have a heart and understand them means so much!
That's an interesting connection: share the road-share the world. And so true. If we don't co-exist and do it "nicely" what a hell we'll live in. I point to the east at this moment, but the attitude "my way or the highway" is everywhere. Has anyone lived on this planet where there wasn't a war somewhere? I haven't.
A great reminder. A little patience and understanding for others can relieve our own stress.
Hi,
This sounds like a very interesting film and I will be looking forward to it coming to Germany. There is a lot of road rage and inconsiderateness here on the interstate although people do not call it that. Maybe this film will awaken respect in us toward each other.
Visiting from the A to Z Blog Challenge 2015.
Shalom,
Patricia at Everything Must Change
J here, stopping by from the #atozchallenge 2015!
Great post. Very true!
I think some people, who believe they have their heart in the right place, need to be more compassionate for the dying. Euthanasia is an abstract idea to many of those people. It is only when one of your own loved ones is laying there, suffering, beyond all medical miracles, that the reality of euthanasia can be fully understood.
But here's another area where I think people need more compassion. (And one of the reasons that I'll never be voted in to any political office.) The protesters outside of Planned Parenthood. Yes, I get that they are opposed to certain medical procedures and such which go on inside. But they aim this anger and opposition at everyone going in. My friend went there because it was the only exam place she could afford. She had a family history of "women's cancers." She wasn't there due to any sexual reasons. She wasn't picking up condoms or having a fetus killed. She just wanted to be screened for cancer without having to be thousands of dollars in debt. For this, she was egged on the way in, and beaten on the way out. I'm not saying pro-life or pro-choice... what I'm saying is to be compassionate to poor people who are just trying to see the only doc in town who will screen for cancer without charging a quarter of your annual salary. Compassion mixed with not making assumptions.
Hey, Nicole! Sorry it took me so long to stop by; it's easy to get lost in all the A to Z blogs and to keep track of my comments. In response to your question, yes - definitely! Your post reminds me of the #1000Speak challenge that's been going on around the blogging community lately, where bloggers share stories of compassion. For me, I think we should show more compassion toward our colleagues at work; we're all caught up in our daily metrics and work goals that it's easy to be overcome by competitiveness. It's important to remember that these people we work with - they aren't just robots! They're people, too! Thanks for bringing up this important topic of compassion - we need more discussions like this!
By the way, I'm hosting a chapter critique giveaway on my blog as part of my A to Z journey! I'm really excited :) Would love for you to enter and be a part of the fun if you're interested! You can find it on my blog under ʺG is for Giveawayʺ - don't forget to use the Rafflecopter form!
Have a great day, Nicole!
-Wendy
Wendy Lu Writes